Talk:Origins/@comment-5308094-20120917083801/@comment-1743498-20120917132519

Pretty good so far. However, unless it's for comedic effect, I would recommend removing this line. In my opinion, it breaches the ominous atmosphere that you just built up:

"Yeah yeah yeah, real scary, right? To be honest, I found that rather campy myself! But I did my best. Whatever, lets get to the fun part..."